Moments in the life of a Pastor

Walking with God

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34. Marriage – God’s Masterpiece or manmade misery – Part 2

1 Peter series – “Holding onto Hope in a Hostile World”

1 Peter 3:1-7

In the same way, you wives must accept the authority of your husbands. Then, even if some refuse to obey the Good News, your godly lives will speak to them without any words. They will be won over 2 by observing your pure and reverent lives. 3 Don’t be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes. 4 You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God. 5 This is how the holy women of old made themselves beautiful. They put their trust in God and accepted the authority of their husbands. 6 For instance, Sarah obeyed her husband, Abraham, and called him her master. You are her daughters when you do what is right without fear of what your husbands might do. 7 In the same way, you husbands must give honor to your wives. Treat your wife with understanding as you live together. She may be weaker than you are, but she is your equal partner in God’s gift of new life. Treat her as you should so your prayers will not be hindered.

Peter starts here by reminding husbands of their call first to:

·      CHERISH – “give honor”

The word “give” means to grant and bestow, it’s in the present tense, meaning that it’s something we are to be continually doing. Many men have the mentality of “I told you I loved you when we got married and if anything changes I will let you know.” A husband is called to honor his wife, to hold her in high regard, to treasure her. Proverbs 31:10 “A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies.” Husbands how are you doing at honoring your wife? Guys, does your wife know that she is more important than anything else in your life? Sometimes I find it helpful to ponder the opposite word in order to get at the true meaning of the word I am trying to understand . Here are some antonyms of honor – to diss, scorn, neglect, disregard, put down, ignore, criticize, condemn and humiliate. Here is the question are you treating her like treasure or trash? If you answer neither then I have only one thing to say stop taking your girl for granted she is a gift. Value her by spending time with her and speaking well of her. Proverbs 31:28: “Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her.” Husbands are you seeking ways to serve and show your spouse that she is special?

·      CONSIDERATION – “Treat your wife with understanding”

This means to be thoughtful of your wife. Get to know her, you know what ticks her off but do you know what makes her tick? Do you know her fears, failures and feelings…and the fun stuff that makes her who she is! Many men treat marriage like a hunting trip, we get all excited about the hunt, we talk about it and put all our energy into planning and pursing but once we pull the trigger and bag the deer it’s over. We take a few pictures or at best have it stuff and mounted on a wall. So it is in our relationship we chase and pursue we expend enormous amounts of energy dating, we staying up late talking and getting to know each other but the moment we get married we stop pursuing and getting to know each other. Your wife should be your school of study, observe her, notice her, pay attention. Some of you know more about guns than your girl, you know more sports stats than your spouse. Let me ask you this question if you were to buy your wife flowers what is her favorite flower and what color? My wife loves yellow roses because yellow is the color of friendship and for her friendship is the most important aspect of our relationship. Ask yourself this question: What does my wife need and how am I doing at meeting those needs? Our call as men is to discover and celebrate who God made our wife to be and then empower and unleash her to live on mission for the glory of God. Are you a student of your spouse? Do you know her love language, and are you learning to speak it?


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32 Jesus in your Job – Part 3

1 Peter series – “Holding onto Hope in a Hostile World”

1 Peter 2:18-25

18 You who are slaves must submit to your masters with all respect.[a] Do what they tell you—not only if they are kind and reasonable, but even if they are cruel. 19 For God is pleased when, conscious of his will, you patiently endure unjust treatment. 20 Of course, you get no credit for being patient if you are beaten for doing wrong. But if you suffer for doing good and endure it patiently, God is pleased with you. 21 For God called you to do good, even if it means suffering, just as Christ suffered[b] for you. He is your example, and you must follow in his steps. 22 He never sinned, nor ever deceived anyone. 23 He did not retaliate when he was insulted, nor threaten revenge when he suffered. He left his case in the hands of God, who always judges fairly. 24 He personally carried our sins in his body on the cross so that we can be dead to sin and live for what is right. By his wounds you are healed. 25 Once you were like sheep who wandered away. But now you have turned to your Shepherd, the Guardian of your souls.

3.     Pattern for Submission – Vs 21

Our pattern for submission is not society it’s the Savior. While society calls us to a life of fun, the Savior calls us to a life of faithfulness. But Christ’s pattern is not just something we observe but something we are to practice. Peter calls this following in the Saviors steps. It’s the idea of stepping where he stepped. If you were following someone through a mine field who knew the way out, how careful would you be following them? Would you step exactly where they stepped or just close to where they stepped? The idea here is that we mirror the Masters moves. So how carefully are you following Christ? This comes back to resting in Him, are you relying on the Redeemer or living recklessly? Are you going to tread on truth or on a trap? Why don’t we faithfully follow in the Saviors steps, because we don’t like where He went. Peter tells us that our first step involves saying yes to:

Suffering – If you’re serious about serving the Savior, then you need to be prepared to suffer for the Savior. When I get all up in wanting to be right and demanding my rights when I’ve been wronged, I remind myself that when I signed up to follow the Savior, I signing up to suffer. One of the biggest problems in the church today is that we have bought into the lie that if we follow the Lord life will be easy. We don’t want to walk down the path of pain, because our focus is on our flesh instead of on being faithful. Instead of chasing after Christ we are chasing comfort. Look following Him will hurt. In John 6 when following Jesus teaching got hard it says that many disciples deserted. It’s easy to follow when things are favorable but what about when the going gets tough, are you going to turn on Him or turn to Him? How do you faithfully follow the Savior in the midst of suffering, focus on Him and not the hurt. Don’t give in to the temptation to live like a victim, remember that in Christ you are a victor. Work is often a struggle but it is worth it when we remember who we are working for. If you sense yourself wanting to pull back or wondering if your ministry matters, or questioning whether your work is worthwhile, allow the words of 1 Corinthians 15:58 to encourage you: “Therefore, my dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.”

The second step we take with the Savior involves saying no to sin. Why is this step so hard because it means saying no to worldly pleasure. What’s ironic is how we refuse to step into suffering with the Savior, yet we readily purse worldly pleasure that leads to pain. Saying no to sin includes not just living in sin but speaking sinfully. Following the Lord means that our lips should match our life. Are you watching what comes out of your mouth, are you guarding against workplace gossip and being careful not to get caught up in complaining about the boss?

The third step involves not striking back. When Jesus was betrayed he didn’t retaliate unlike Peter who as he penned these words probably recalled his response of retaliation. He sliced off the soldier’s ear with his sword. In the midst of the conflict Jesus demonstrated care and compassion, He used His power to heal and not to hurt. After telling them to put their swords away He said in Matthew 26:53: “Do you think I cannot call on my Father, and he will at once put at my disposal more than twelve legions of angels?” A Roman legion could contain as many as 6,000 men, so Jesus was talking about and angelic army of 72,000. All He had to do was say the word and the soldiers would be smoked, in fact if He had retaliated all of Rome would have been left in ruin. He had the power to wipe out the world but instead he died for it. What about you are you serving like the Savior or sword swinging Peter? Are you healing or hurting? Are you living out God’s Will or leaving a trail of wounded in your wake? Do you need to put your sword away? Why do we struggle to serve and scar those around us, because we try to serve in our strength and not the Saviors. Peter reminds us that Jesus did the work on the cross and we have to serve in His strength. Are you serving in the Saviors power or self’s? Walking in His steps means staying not straying. Are you a wayward sheep serving self or a sacrificial one serving the Savior?